Is Break Up Breaking You?

Ending a relationship had never been easy. But to move on is an essential step. Feeling depressed and low is something which you can overcome with your near ones’ support and company. But you must take care that these negative feelings can be dealt to an extent but if they are getting frenzied it might affect you mentally and physically.

Ever since I broke up my eight years old relationship with my boyfriend, I have completely lost interest in anything else and many times I feel like killing myself. Is it normal to feel this way?

 It is normal to feel sad and stressed about broken relationships but what you are feeling is extremely distasteful. All of the symptoms that you have described are of depression. You might be facing symptoms like decrease in your appetite, excessive sleep, loss of interest in daily activities, irritability, feeling blue and crying for no reason whatsoever, fatigue, loss of social life and hopelessness. These are typical depression factors. But what I consider most dangerous is that you are entertaining suicidal thoughts. Once inside your head, consciously or unconsciously, you begin to contemplate it as a viable last option. And given the influence of depression and your low moods, there has to be an intervention for you. You have reached out for help and this is the first and most important step – you willingness to accept help. You need more than just counselling in overcoming this disorder and it might also take some time while doing so. While I would like to suggest a lot of things to you, I would like to stress on the facts that you have to never lose hope and be strong. Depression, like any other disorder or illness can be corrected when you and the counsellors work together.

Firstly, visit a psychologist who will administer tests and inventories on you. These will help ascertain the variety and intensity of problems that you are experiencing inside your mind. Once it is certain that you are in fact hosting depression, and then you will be referred to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist shall give you certain medications to stabilize the chemical and hormonal secretions in your body which cause depressive symptoms. Once you start feeling better and your state of mind comes back to a higher level of understanding, then the psychologist shall help you address the elephant in the room. That is when the psychologist will administer therapies and counselling helping you understand and cope up with reality. Initially the medications will be heavy and the counselling of a light nature. However, as time lapses, your counselling sessions will rise vigorously along with therapies while the medications will begin to fade, thus, decreasing your dependence on medication to nil. The counselling might last for quite some time and even after you are done with the sessions, you might be called in for occasional check-ups. This is to make sure that you do not lapse back into depression as it is the nature of depression to appear again. 

There are other healthy lifestyle choices that can increase resistance to stress. Eat a healthy diet. Well-nourished bodies are better prepared to cope with stress, so be mindful of what you eat. Start your day right with breakfast, and keep your energy up and your mind clear with balanced, nutritious meals throughout the day.

Reduce caffeine and sugar. The temporary "highs" caffeine and sugar provide often end in with a crash in mood and energy. By reducing the amount of coffee, soft drinks, chocolate, and sugar snacks in your diet, you’ll feel more relaxed and you’ll sleep better.

Avoid alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs. Self-medicating with alcohol or drugs may provide an easy escape from stress, but the relief is only temporary. Don’t avoid or mask the issue at hand; deal with problems head on and with a clear mind.

Get enough sleep. Adequate sleep fuels your mind, as well as your body. Feeling tired will definitely increase your stress because it may cause you to think irrationally.