The Man Rules |
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The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally , the guys' side of the story. ( I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear ' the rules' from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side: These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE! 1. Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...... Really . 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football or motor sports 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh. WolfWoodWares OBA |
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Comments (8)
 HP: 125  |
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| Jean, thanks for the confirmation!! ;-)
Unlimited Wii Downloads! |
 HP: 410 |
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| LOL... I had to read thru all the comments and I didn't get them until the last that had repeated the joke ... so I scrolled back up and noticed they all had the # one !!! great list of rules... Join FREE DM open in INDIA for IR  Group Administrator
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 HP: 22 |
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| Snakes.... This is hilarious and unfortunately all the #1's apply to all the man I know!!! Thanks a million...my husband came in hearing my laughter and read it too and said " See this is what I"ve been telling you throughout our marriage" (of too long 32 years !). I will most definitely pass this on. www.dpbolvw.net/email-2740249-10389126 mastertikitak.ning.com |
 HP: 66 |
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| No, No, NO, David, You're wrong ! :-) WolfWoodWares OBA |
 HP: 260 |
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| You know there is a nice song for all you guys, I'll have to post it for you. Goes into all those "man rules"
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HP: 125 |
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| Rule 1 is right, but rule 1 is wrong! lol
No, hints do not work, and by the way, hints do not work. Did I mention hints do not work? Oh, we get them, we just refuse to react. Respect was invented by a man, that is why women USUALLY don't understand the concept... When a woman says NO, it doesn't REALLY mean NO. It might mean: "You haven't convinced me, try harder." It might mean: "I want to negotiate on this one." It might mean: "Yes." In fact, it usually means ANYTHING except "NO!" I could go on and on.... Thanks for the laugh Jean! Unlimited Wii Downloads! |
 HP: 38 |
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| There are only two rules for my wife and I.
1 - There are no rules 2 - er . . .er . . . I forget that one. The Old Coot |
 HP: 195 |
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| heh...I especially like rules number 1 through 1, except for number 1 which is wrong...LOL!
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