By Michael Oliver:

LH asks, “One thing I seem to keep running into, and I think seems to be a hang-up for many is, that they are afraid of selling or afraid that they won’t have anyone to talk to or afraid that they just can’t do it.

Sometimes this is vocalized and sometimes I feel that it’s just an underlying concern that seems present. So, I’m wondering how to combat that right from the get go. What questions can I ask to ‘get that fear out of the way’ and addressed as quickly as possible?”

Here’s my reply.

Many people’s vision of “selling” as that of the soft shoe salesperson! It’s a real mental hurdle for a lot of potential customers and partners. They have their own experiences of what selling is that moulds their thoughts about it.

Quite frankly, the best way to approach it is to not be what they expect you to be! Which is why you use Natural Selling as an approach because it’s 180 degrees from what most people expect.

By doing this, you can be much more successful and you can also USE the way you talk with them as an EXAMPLE of communicating effectively and fearlessly.

In other words you let them know how and why you are communicating with them the Natural Selling way!

A key is to install in your mind that selling is a “problem solving exercise” and not an exercise in persuasion. You must also be able to demonstrate that with your words and actions. If you want examples of how to think like this and how to do it, you’ll find it useful to listen to any one of my Power Up Your Dialogue CD’s. Click on the link for more information.

To help you address people’s possible fear about selling and to help them get a different perspective, I’ve laid out for you a string of questions that I’ve found to be very effective.

Remember to use a relaxed, conversational, matter of fact, non-aggressive tone… just as in the rest of your dialogue…

Can I ask… Have you ever sold anything before?

How was that for you? or, What was your Experience like?
Were you successful?

Tell me more.

You can then go on to ask questions like…

Can I ask what your understanding of selling is? Or…

How would you describe selling in your own words?

So would it be correct to assume that you would feel uncomfortable doing that?

Why is that?

Well, I probably would as well if I had to do what you’re describing… and let me ask you, what if selling wasn’t necessarily what you thought it was? What if there was a way of communicating with people that was attractive, helped the both of you get what you both wanted and comfortable for you and whoever you’re talking with at the same time? Would that make a difference?

For example, how do you feel about the way you and I have been and are talking?

Who has the conversation been mostly about?

Do you feel as if I’ve been selling you when you compare me to your definition of selling?

What do you think we have been doing?

What if you could do the same thing? What if you could be trained to do what we’re doing that would allow you to talk with anyone, anywhere, anytime… feel comfortable build your business comfortably and even strengthen your personal relationships?

What if you could be trained to communicate with people easily and effortlessly just as you and I are talking with each other?

See how it flows? Obviously your questions will vary depending on each response you get, and that’s part of gaining experience from continual use.

I also think it’s appropriate to bring the “selling” issue up in the first conversation, if possible, using questions like…

Let me ask you, have you ever sold anything before?

How do you feel about selling this opportunity to others?

Do you think you could talk about this idea with others, if you like what we’re doing?

What is your experience in selling?

You can then interweave or use the same strings of questions I outlined previously!

This is how you dialogue with people to help them question or remove their present thinking and influence themselves to change. Remember to listen to examples on my “How To Have Fearless Conversations and Build Your Business Faster…” by clicking here.

And to paraphrase Mae West – “It’s not just what you ask honey, it’s the way you ask it!”
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