New Decorating Ideas
by Nick Austin Online RetailerYou’ve trawled the high street and the
internet (all of it, mind!) but nothing gets you going. It used to
be so easy; a lick of paint, some new cushions and voila! Your
decorating itch was scratched for another few months, but like some
kind of desperate interior design junkie you need more and greater highs
to satisfy the hunger. Well, help is at hand because just a few clicks away is
the wonder product you’ve been craving you naughty person you. I’m talking
about the self-adhesive vinyl wall sticker.
You won’t have seen them in shops,
retailers are too scared of this daring sensation. Maybe they think it’s too
hard for the customer to install? Nonsense, any fool can do it, even a crazed
decorating slave like you. Maybe they think it’s too niche, too specialized?
Well they haven’t counted on the existence of home accessory thrill
seekers like you, riding the cutting edge and plunging off into the unknown in
desperate attempts to satisfy their twisted need.
“But what is a wall sticker?” I hear
you wail as you claw, whimpering at my door while I grin at your pathetic form
through the letterbox from the safety of my achingly cool pad-or-ette.
Simply put, it is a sticky backed poly-vinyl silhouette sandwiched between
two sheets that will adhere to any smooth surface, is UV resistant in direct
sunlight for five years and will leave the wall unscathed when it is
removed, ready for the next design in your increasingly desperate attempts to
satiate your demented, swivel-eyed lust.
The moaning increases as I list further
benefits of this incredible boon to the terminal interiors ghoul: They are
available in countless shapes and sizes, featuring designs of anything
from birdcages to forests, superstar celebrities to cuddly bunnies.
Many are even tasteful. They range in price from about thirty pounds to a
hundred and fifty. Many come with myriad colour options and some are even full
colour printed. They are gone in an instant or last forever…..
“Please let me have one” you groan
though the gap under the door while I decide which espadrilles I
shall wear to climb the stairs and away from this unpleasantness. “You’ll have
to look online” I say and list a handful of reputable operators in the field.
Eventually the sobbing recedes and peace descends once more on my fabulous
home.
Where will it all end, this frantic
search for novelty? Will you be found one day upside down in a bucket
with all your ceilings covered in clogs? Will you remove the roof of your
home and try and turn it into a yacht? Who knows. Hopefully we can delay the
inevitable and divert you for a while and perhaps even stop the frenzy
altogether, after all, wall stickers are practically infinite in
themselves. But I fear your case is a bad one and a brief respite is all we can
hope for. Still, your friends will be impressed, even if this is your last
gasp of sanity.
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Created on Dec 31st 1969 18:00. Viewed 0 times.