The Roots of the Shame and Guilt of Divorce

One of the breeding grounds for judgment is within society itself.

When you're married, your vows reinforce the belief that that union is until death do you part.

Society doesn't like divorce, it represents being broken, and it's hard to not take that personally.

Divorce is perceived as a failed marriage, when in truth, at least according to comedian Lewis Black, "No good marriage ends in divorce." And who says every relationship is meant to last forever? Well, apparently those vows do, and when they're broken, we can feel like we failed, didn't try enough, weren't good enough, and those feelings, thoughts, beliefs, can be devastating.

We're just not good enough, should've recognized the problems sooner, stayed too long, or shouldn't have married the wrong person.

All of those messages, each one contradicting the other, and lacking any foundation in reality, still add fuel to the fire of guilt and shame.

So how can we rid ourselves of the shame and guilt of divorce, and not allow those damaging feelings to take up more space than they deserve?

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