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What is the most unequal love you have ever seen?
A well-known female writer, she is also the queen of TV screenwriters. She is beautiful, hardworking, and smart in clothes. She leaves home at three or four o'clock every afternoon to go to the lover's house. Her lover Mr. N is a married man who is thirteen years older than her-separated and unable to divorce, the man is not handsome, fat, tall as hers, in poor health, no job, and living in a tight life.
The female writer made a sumptuous dinner for her lovers, and the two chatted. Sometimes female writers fall asleep because they are too tired. Before she left, she would prepare food for the lover the next day, and she returned to her home at about 11 o'clock in the evening. Her mother and sister were already asleep, and she was hiding in the entrance, where there was no heat, and writing until dawn. In the early morning, the writing place has been cleaned up and turned into an icy space connected to the hallway.
The female writer cooks meals for her mother and sister, organizes chores, works, and goes to her lover's house... the cycle begins again and again.
The love between the female writer and her lover lasted from her teenage years to middle age, and throughout the golden period of her life. The lover is a photographer at the cultural agency that she worked in in her 20s. When she was young, she might have some brilliance as a predecessor, but for the rest of the long years, she was just a middle-aged man who was physically weak and mentally fragile. The female writer took care of it.
This is the most unequal love I have ever seen.
The female writer was named Kuniko Muko, and she was hailed as "Zhang Ailing of the Showa nation". Looking at the writings of Tian Bangzi and Zhang Ailing, there are indeed similarities. They both love to write about family and love, both are vicious, and love to write about the awkwardness of people's hearts, but they are still very different.
Zhang Ailing’s novels always write "disillusionment". Her novel male protagonists are always overseas students or overseas Chinese: Fan Liuyuan, Tong Zhenbao, Tong Shifang, Zhang Yunfan... They have a kind of faint love and nostalgia for ancient China, and love is projected on the heroine—— On "a real Chinese woman", after the interaction, the man found that it was just a beautiful void, extravagantly broken, and then disappointed.
Bangzi Xiangtian's novel has no hope at the beginning. Most of the protagonists in her novels are older single, ordinary women, a little vain, a little inferior, longing to be loved, longing to be touched, and giving up all dignity for these longings. In love, it begins with disappointment and ends with disappointment. All the warmth is provided by herself. Taozi in her novel said, “As long as you find something funny, I want to laugh as soon as I can laugh. She hopes through Laugh to motivate yourself."
—— Zhang Ailing would rather let the protagonist sink to the end than let her have such desperate optimism.
But Bangzi Xiangtian must be optimistic. Her father was violent-even more violent after the affair. As the eldest daughter, she became the only support in the family, taking care of the family, taking care of younger siblings, writing all night, and earning household income.
According to the number of idol dramas, such a woman should be redeemed by love, and a partner with a solid family takes her hand and takes over the burden of her life. But the reality is that her love is secret and forbearing. She has not been taken care of, but one more person needs to be taken care of.
We always use "distressed" to describe emotions that we cannot understand. Distressed for unmarried women, for improper marriages, for couples who have been in love for more than ten years and cannot get married.
Can we feel sorry for Xiangtian Bangzi?
I used to wonder why Xiang Tian Bangzi could maintain such a strong creative power, and created more than 1,000 scripts and more than 10,000 radio plays. Just because of material pressure, it is impossible to be so diligent. When I saw that she had a lover like Mr. N, I seemed to understand a little bit.
Her lover does not occupy a little bit of her life. Mr. N’s incompetence turned out to be a gift. His everyday life revolves around Bangzi, and the happiest moment is when the two talk intimately at home for dinner. When Bangzi was asleep, he looked at her silently, thinking in his heart: hurry up and cheer up, lost lamb. In the morning when Bangzi was away, he listened to her broadcast and smiled.
The meaning of Mr. N in Xiangtian Bangzi's life can be turned into a gentle look.
If love is not equal, let me be the one who loves more.
If Xiang Tian Bangzi married a capable man, married and had children for him, entertained his friends, and depended on his life. She also cannot maintain a productive and focused creation.
Don't worry about unequal love, because love is unequal.
I like a poem by Oden: "How do we expect the stars to burn for us?
With the passion that we can't return?
If love is not equal,
Let me be the one who loves more. "
Bangzi Xiangtian and Mr. N, who loves more?
Mr. N committed suicide without warning in his 40s, perhaps because his increasingly weaker body made him feel hopeless in his life.
Xiang Tian Bangzi was driven out by his father that year and rented a small house to continue his creation.
In a room for one person, only cats are the company.
Ten years later, Xiang Tian Bangzi won the Naoki Award at the age of 51. Public opinion was dissatisfied with her and thought she was unworthy. Xiang Tian Bangzi said: "I have been focusing on literature for 20 years. I sacrificed my wife's identity and children, and everything was sacrificed. There are also people around me. A literary friend who committed suicide in desperation. I got a little fame in the outside world. The examiner gave me an ordinary award, and someone asked me to dismiss it. I was really furious."
But there are still doubts that she is too young.
The following year, Xiangtian Bangzi died in an air crash.
Created on Dec 26th 2020 21:03. Viewed 307 times.
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Text Chemistry is every woman’s ultimate guide for taking control of their love life by learning how to create undeniable chemistry with any man through text messages. Text Chemistry was designed to be helpful for any woman who wants to find or strengthen a romantic relationship. The program is that it is backed by a huge amount of research studies on attraction, relationships and communication. Essentially, the idea is that specific texts can be used to capture a mans attention and keep it, so that he is always thinking about you and becoming more and more invested and infatuated – thereby allowing you to build the foundation of a strong, healthy relationship. It covers everything you could imagine, from deciphering confusing text messages to sending emojis, avoiding awkward requests for nudes and more. All of this is broken down into a three-part process that’s designed to provide you with the information you need to succeed, and the steps you need to turn your newfound knowledge into action.Text Chemistry
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