Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction by Ulla Sarja

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction

by Ulla Sarja Psychotherapist, educator, coach

Mindfulness is a state where you are living in the present and participate in life as it unfolds, without values and without wishing that it would be different. You welcome everything coming on your way without hanging on to what is pleasant or repelling things that are unpleasant. You don´t even try to control what is going on, you just try to accept it and let it be. The best examples of how to live in mindfulness are young children. They are living in this state all the time, quite naturally, they do not judge, they do not value but they are curious about everything that happens. They do it unconsciously, that's what is natural for them. In mindfulness-oriented exercises you are trying to relive this state but now consciously. The word Beginner’s Mind describes the feeling we are trying to achieve, as if we were here and now for the first time and saw and experienced everything the first time with unprejudiced curiosity.

When practicing this kind of meditation and lifestyle, you can make you whole life work better. You don´t need to worry about the future or have feelings to have been failed when doing something yesterday. You just live here and now, nothing more. You are already where you should be, so don´t worry, being happy.

There are several exercises to find the way to this kind of living; without stress and worries. There are some exercises you are going to learn when reading further.

Every day is a journey
Every Day is a Journey... and the journey is home. This quote really says it all; where you are, you are at home. That is what mindfulness is about, only this moment and nothing more. Sounds too simple? It does, I think, because I know it is not so very easy to just stay in existence and.... Do what? Consider that you are looking through different glasses, glasses that are not colored by their surroundings, they do not enlarge or diminish either, but they only show what there is to see.

It's not that easy in real life as every one of us know, if you feel bad, you feel bad, and in that particular moment these thoughts will not help. But in the long run, they can be very helpful.

Imagine that you are walking along a familiar street. ... You see someone you know across the street ... You smile and wave ... The other one does not respond ... she or he does not seems not to notice you at all... she or he just is going on without showing any sign to know recognize you.

What emotions are awakened within you?
What thoughts or images are passing through your mind?

The power of your thoughts
The emotions that the situation I described in the previous post arouses in you depends entirely on how you see yourself and how you feel. Often we interpret the situation from our own thoughts and do not take into account that you can never really know what the other people think.
The reaction to the other's behavior depends on the story we tell ourselves, the learned automatic thought within us continually interpreting everything we see and hear. If you do not feel well when the situation occurs, you will probably interpret it as the other person deliberately ignores you and no longer wants to know anything about you.
So this is probably how your internal monologue goes on. However, if you feel well that day you might think that the other person probably did not see you because he was just thinking something and did not see you. And, this is about exactly the same situation, and it’s just your inner voice acting as a critic or as a friend, and informing you what to feel.

Since this works as it should of course be entirely possible to determine what the inner voice or "the man in the machine" may tell you. If your answer is no, it means you are not able to choose what you should think.
Peace is something that can only exist here and now. It is absurd to say, "Wait until I finish this, then I will live in peace." What is "this"?
A diploma, a job, a house or some payment you have to do? If you think like that, you will never be able to live in peace. There will always be a new "just this thing" after the former. If you do not live in peace right now, you'll never make it in the future either. If you with all your heart want to live in peace, you feel peace now, in this moment.

When we begin to feel lost or confused about various aspects of our lives, our first instinct is to search for direction. We feel sure that the answers we need are out there somewhere, and finding them will help us to know the right way to turn.

While seeking advice and guidance from others can be helpful at times, it is not always the best way to help ourselves. Rather than relying on someone else to tell us our truth, we can instead choose to look within and find the answers inside ourselves. Each of us has been given the gift of an inner advisor that will never steer us wrong.
Otherwise, this is just about "the hope of peace of mind sometime in the future."
-Thich Nhat Hanh, The Sun My Heart

Negative thoughts can trigger a depression or nourish a temporary depression. All self-critical thoughts are triggered and we are feeling worthless. This tends then to become a vicious spiral, "Why am I so stupid?” Then you give an answer to yourself: "Because I'm so worthless" ... and so on.
All people are unhappy at some point in their lives and that in itself is not a problem but it is the negative values that we place on ourselves that can lead to depression. If we are trying to see all this as just thoughts, and not putting values on these, then we have the solution. It's something you learn through mindfulness. If you let these negative thoughts be activated, they will affect your body and your physical health in turn has effects on your mind and emotions. The result: STRESS!

Mindfulness, meaning being consciously in this moment is a perpetual, non-judgmental awareness promoted by attention. Conscious presence is a natural part of life. It can be reinforced through practice. Such practice is sometimes called meditation. BUT MEDITATION IN THIS CASE IS NOT WHAT YOU ARE THINKING OF, I suppose.

Meditation is in fact about being alert, and we can just use all our senses, even consciousness. Mindfulness is a way to be friends with yourself and your own experiences. Our experience includes of course very much, including our bodies, our minds and the world. (Jon Kabat - Zinn, 2009).