Self Esteem for Children - Top 3 tips

In todays fast paced, ever changing world, it is important that children develop a sense of self esteem / self worth at a young age.

Children are bombarded by external inputs and they need to develop a filter system so they know what is important to them and also techniques so that they can respond appropriately to everyday situations.

 

Our top 3 tips for parents on how to support Self Esteem for their children are as follows 

 

1) Children learn by watching , so become an example.

 

Children learn by watching and their first teachers are always the parents.

So on a day to day basis what message are you giving your children? 

·  Do you show high levels of self-esteem?

·  Are you in control of your emotions? 

·  Are you able to respond and not react to the daily life challenges? 

·  What words to you speak? Are they positive and uplifting?

·  What behaviours do you show? Are you positive and happy or sulky and unhappy?

 

Remember that children are watching you and listening to you and emulating you.

Become the best example that you can be.

Of course the daily pressures of life will challenge you , so learn to count to 3 before you respond to any situation and this gives you enough time to make a chosen response.

Always and in all ways chose a positive and considered response to a situation.

 

2) Drop the labels 

 

We think its harmless, but attaching labels and nick names to a child can seriously damage their self esteem.

Watch “throw away comments” that could hurt a child in ways you could not imagine.

Also watch the identity that you build up for your child. 

 

A few examples that we have experienced at SoulKids 

·  A child is proud to announce to the room “I am Asthmatic” therefore I cannot run around.

·  My brother is better than me - may parents tell me this

·  My dad wanted a son - but we were all daughters

·  I am stupid, everyone tells me this, so why should I behave…

·  I am no good at spelling

·  Everyone hates my hair 

 

We believe you should reward the positives in your child; reward health ( not sickness) , reward positive comments about themselves ( not negative ) 

Be aware that saying negatives can give the child more attention, however you need to reverse this so they get attention when positive and uplifting about themselves.

 

 

3) Express feelings 

 

Allow your child to express their feelings - both positive and negative ones 

This way they learn to become positive without over exaggerating / wanting to win over others and they learn to express sadness, disappointment, frustration and anger without lashing out at others.

 

The art of expressing feelings in a calm and control manner is the key here.

It is OK to be unhappy, angry or frustrated, however do so in a chosen manner and do not simple last out and “lose it”

 

Name the emotions and allow children the opportunity to learn how to express them in a chosen manner.

 

 

We are here to help you at SoulKids, so please do connect and find out how your child can join a group session or have a private one on one coaching.

 

For more information click here Enrichment Class.