It’s Only Business, Bend Over!

It’s Only Business, Bend Over!

Once upon a time…

#1.. “The Customer was Always Right”
#2.. “If the customer was wrong… see #1″Well guess what folks, YOU are not a customer any more!  That’s right your role has been usurped by that of a “guest”.  Therefore you need no longer be treated with respect, dignity or helped in any way unless defined by company policy.

Since you are no longer a customer you can now be argued with, denied a refund, refused service, charged extra fees, thrown from the store or even banned for demanding that you be treated with respect and dignity.

I was in a large major chain the other day and my 5 year old son was right at my side.  Distracted for a moment by his sisters demands that I buy “This right now or they would die” I turned my eye away from him for just a moment and POOF he was gone.

Now I am not one to panic, calm under fire and cold as ice in a crisis I totally lost it.  This was my baby hand he was missing!  Sending his siblings out in all directions I selected one for myself and scoured the store… how can a 5 year old just disappear like that?

Not having found him I ran to the customer service desk to have them use the PA system to aid me by announcing that he should meet me in the toy isle (he knows where that is.)  Guess what… They can’t do that as it’s against store policy.  HUH?

What they could do was summon the “loss prevention agent” and have him authorize the
“floor associates” to assist in a “guest” search…  Excuse my German but …WTF!

What on earth is a “loss prevention agent”?  What happened to the manager?  Was he kidnapped by aliens?  Where did all the sales people vanish to?  I do not know and have no interest in finding out about floor associates unless they are there to clean up a mess in isle 14.

When I go to a store I am a CUSTOMER!  I am not a reveler there to party, a friend who just dropping in to say “Hi” or a guest invited to dinner but a “red blooded, cash carrying, living, breathing, here to shop till I drop CUSTOMER”!  And right now this here CUSTOMER needs help from the STORE MANAGER and the SALES PEOPLE in finding a missing 5 year old!

I guess I must have been thinking out loud, because by the time I took another breath they had all vanished.  It seems that they were not interested in helping a CUSTOMER find a missing boy. I was fuming, pulse pounding and a full head of steam blasting from my ears.  I was going to hunt down and pin the next “associate” against the wall and demand they help this “CUSTOMER” find their missing boy “or else”.

A missing boy who picked that exact moment to walk up looking all angelic and innocent and loudly inquired as to where I had gone as he had just gone to look at something when I disappeared on him… sigh, kids, so innocent.

Considerably calmer I asked the person behind the counter about the interesting titles sported by the people who worked there and why I was no longer treated or addressed as a customer.

The reply…. “I can not discuss company policy with you, and it does not matter anyway as it’s only business.”

So fellow “Guests”, next time you go shopping and need help from a manager or sales person, don’t expect any… just bend over, because its only business.

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