Why Couples Should Talk Money on Valentine’s Day—And How It Can Strengthen Relationships

Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love, but this year, financial experts suggest adding something unconventional to the mix—money talk. With finances ranking among the top stressors in relationships, experts say blending financial planning with romance can help couples build a stronger foundation for the future.

The Link Between Love and Money

For many couples, money can be a source of tension. Studies show that financial disagreements are one of the leading causes of stress and even divorce. Whether it’s differences in spending habits, conflicting financial goals, or uncertainty about the future, money issues can create significant relationship roadblocks.

Michael A. Scarpati, CEO of RetireUS and a Texas-based financial expert, believes that financial planning shouldn’t be a dreaded task—it should be a shared experience. "One way my wife and I make financial planning enjoyable is by turning it into a creative event,” Scarpati says. “We pull out a large paper calendar, grab some colorful markers, pour a glass of wine, and turn on some music. As we map out our year—trips, commitments, and goals—it becomes a fun and visual way to plan both our finances and our future together. It shifts the conversation from ‘budgeting’ to designing the life we want, making it a shared adventure rather than a chore.”

This perspective aligns with recent trends showing that couples who communicate openly about money are more likely to experience long-term financial stability and relationship satisfaction. According to a 2023 study from the National Endowment for Financial Education, couples who regularly discuss their finances report higher levels of trust and fewer conflicts over spending.

Turning Financial Planning Into a Fun Date

Instead of treating financial conversations as stressful obligations, experts recommend incorporating them into a relaxed, enjoyable setting. One approach is the “Money Date”—a dedicated time where couples can talk openly about their financial goals, future plans, and shared responsibilities while engaging in an activity they enjoy.

Financial planners suggest several ways to make money discussions more engaging:

• Set the Mood – Light candles, play music, or enjoy a favorite meal together while discussing financial goals.

• Use Visuals – A large calendar or a vision board can make financial planning feel like goal-setting rather than budgeting.

• Celebrate Small Wins – Acknowledge progress toward financial goals to keep motivation high.

• Balance the Conversation – Include short-term rewards like planning a vacation alongside long-term financial goals like saving for retirement.

The Benefits of Financial Transparency in Relationships

According to the American Psychological Association, nearly 70% of Americans say financial stress impacts their personal well-being. But for couples, openly discussing money can reduce anxiety and lead to better financial outcomes. Experts suggest that when both partners have a clear understanding of their financial situation, they are more likely to make informed decisions together, reducing conflict and increasing financial security.

Scarpati notes that Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to start the conversation. “A little planning now can mean fewer financial headaches later—and more stress-free date nights in the future,” he says.

Love, Money, and the Future

While traditional Valentine’s Day gifts like flowers and chocolates are always appreciated, experts say that couples who take time to discuss their finances are making an even greater investment in their future. Financial compatibility is an essential part of any long-term relationship, and building a solid plan together can ensure that both partners are aligned in their goals.

With rising inflation, economic uncertainty, and increasing financial responsibilities, couples are looking for new ways to stay on the same page financially. By turning financial planning into a collaborative and even fun experience, couples can transform money discussions from a point of stress into a source of strength.

As Valentine’s Day approaches, financial planners like Scarpati encourage couples to think beyond romantic gestures and consider how they can invest in their shared future. Whether it’s over dinner, drinks, or a weekend getaway, taking time to talk about finances could be the most meaningful gift of all.

Photo by Everton Vila