Men: Don’t underestimate the power of pre-play. And whether
penetration is on the table or not, there are ways to pleasure a woman that
ought not be neglected. Along with practicing proper male organ care and learning how to use his member
well, a man should beef up on his outer play skills.
There are many reasons a man may neglect
developing and implementing such skills. He may be nervous that he won’t “do it
right,” and feel embarrassed about not knowing what to do. He also may just be
so wrapped up in his own pleasure that he ignores that of his partner. These
issues need to be overcome. Sensual activity, whether penetrative or not,
involves two people. Two people should be experiencing pleasure. The following
tips can help men more fully engage their partners during outer play.
1) Be confident. Being afraid to do things during sensual
play is a big deterrent to actually doing things. If a partner has expressed
consent (clearly and explicitly), then she wants the man. That should be a
confidence-booster in itself.
2) Also, be humble. However, being confident doesn’t mean
diving into new activities without first getting the okay and knowing what she
likes. It is in no way a sign of weakness or ineptitude to ask a woman what she
wants. Rather, when a man does so, he shows that he respects her as an
individual with unique desires. He also shows that he wants to give her the
most pleasure possible – a huge turn-on!
3)
Mouth play. Kissing is often the first step toward
sensual activity (though one should never assume the latter is an inevitable
outcome of the act). While preferences vary, it’s a good bet that a woman
doesn’t want to be slobbered all over. A man should try to keep his lips on
hers rather than engulfing the lower half of her face. Swallow from time to
time to prevent excess saliva from covering her face. Be gentle at first when
moving the lips around her body; she may like nibbling, but let her tell you,
or ask her. She may not be into it at all, or she may want to see your marks on
her days later. Don’t assume.
4)
Nipple play. If a woman has expressed interest in
nipple play, begin gently. Some women like very light caresses with fingers and
the tongue; others like rough twisting, pinching and pulling; others like
something in between. It’s best to err on the side of caution. Ask her, “Is
that good? Is this too rough? Do you want it rougher?” She’ll tell you what
she’s comfortable with. Starting off with the more extreme stuff can cause
pain, an immediate turn-off (for some).
5)
C-Spot play. If a man isn’t sure how far a woman wants
to go, he should ask if it’s okay if he touches her down there. Or, best case
scenario, she may put his hand there herself. It’s normal for guys to be a bit
hesitant about stimulating her, because a guy might not be sure how a woman
likes it. Here as in other situations, it’s best to be gentle. Start with slow,
soft circles around her C-spot. A man will hear her responses, and he can
slowly speed up or increase pressure, asking her along the way if she likes it
like that. If tongue action is desired, proceed in a likewise cautious fashion.
6)
Fingering. Once
she begins to get wet, the partners may desire some internal finger action.
Don’t just jab two or three fingers in there; start by circling the entrance,
then slide one finger in, moving it around. Most women enjoy G-spot
stimulation, which requires more than just thrusting a finger (or two) in and
out. With a man’s palm facing her C-spot, he can wiggle his finger in a “come
hither” motion a couple inches in, varying speed. He’ll know if he’s hitting the
spot by her reaction.
Along with asking permission and
questions throughout outer play, a man can up his game by taking the best care
of his male organ possible. This will make a man’s member more appealing and
inviting to his partner. Avoiding dry, flaky skin and unwanted odors are
crucial steps here. Along with proper washing, using a male organ health crème (health
professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) can go a long way. Natural
moisturizers like Shea butter and vitamin E keep the skin soft and supple,
while vitamin A fights odor-causing bacteria. Knowing how to pleasure her is
key; so is presenting a manhood that she wants to touch.
Visit http://www.menshealthfirst.com for additional information on most common male organ
health issues, tips on improving organ sensitivity and what to do to maintain a
healthy manhood. John Dugan is a professional writer who specializes in men's
health issues and is an ongoing contributing writer to numerous websites.