Jennifurr The Opposum Lays Down The Law! LOL! :)

It's August and sometime around the middle of this month, "Move-In" day is gonna happen again... For those of you readers who don't live near colleges or universities- "Move In" day is an ominous,onerous Slice-Of-Hell for people who cherish their "peace and quiet" and would prefer to go anywhere, be anywhere, but here at home- during this raucous and rowdy "ritual"! After the parents are chased off, some move-in keg parties would go on for days! The spectacle of drunken girls and guys, mainly freshmen, attempting to handle the August heat, their furniture, boxes and other crap - while simultaniously inhaling beer after beer, and for the truly stupid- mixed drinks and shots, has provided some outrageously funny and baffling moments... Declining to continue my losing battle against the noise of move-in day, I attempted to complete my work at night, pecking away at the project 'til 4 am and napping, hoping to make an early start on Friday morning but, naturally, I slept in... Around one'o clock in the afternoon, I decided to dump my Friday schedule and just take a break. The project required me to record some keyboard music and poetry for an upcoming "Open Mike" appearance at a downtown bar- but it simply wasn't gonna happen! First of all, the air conditioner had taken a fit and decided to croak in the middle of a fire-blasting heatwave (I swear there's a conspiracy!) and the cracker barrel of an apartment I was living in at the time,transformed itself into a humid, horrid butt-steamer! And, of course more and more noise violently penetrated the non-sound proof walls and ruined my recording efforts... I simply had to get out of there! Just simply going outside did little to relieve me of that tropical burden, I knew that the best place for me was the good, old-fashioned taproom around the corner... It was cool,quiet and dark in there, the only bright light being temporarily provided when someone opened the door to enter or exit... Three mugs of ice-cold lager later, I felt human again and decided to order lunch... This is the kind of place that courts the older neighborhood residents as it's main clientele, it's simply too dark and introspective for the college crowd. (Saints be praised! An oasis in the maddness!) My burger looked like it was the size of a small country! I love the way they make 'em here. The owner's wife still turned them out by hand and according to how she felt about a particular client, the burger could go from regular size to huge! I was flattered and tossed her a quick smile as she looked out of the kitchen cubbyhole. Biting into that charred masterpiece (I like 'em black and rare),I closed my eyes and savored the goodness of one hell of a sandwich... Some of my companion bar patrons were grousing about those "move-in day a**holes!" and rightly so... the kids were intent on partying and drinking and blasting music. Not a good way to endear your neighbors...human or animal... As I left the bar to return home, I wondered where the time had gone. It had been a good six or seven hour respite and apparently the mix of great food and good beer plus lively conversation simply made the hours vanish, and it was nearing dark now... Directly across the street from me there was a converted castle (I kid you not!) that was going to become the new home for the six squealing, drunken college girls who, earlier in the day, been the source of a loud and rowdy move-in party. I decided to sit on my front porch and watch the "goings on" as the girls ran in and out of the "castle" bringing in small bags and luggage and, of course, pausing to drink beers and shots between tasks... The now giddy and giggling girls decided to sit down on their front steps and have a loud and grating conversation about nothing in particular... Looking across the street at them and wistfully wondering about the impending fate of the world, I caught a movement about 30 feet to the left of where the girls were sitting- It was Jenny, the neighborhood oppossum! I named her after she had given birth to twin kits under the porch that I was sitting on now... She looked like the typical opossum except that she was very large, the size of a small hound, and unlike most opossums- she was ornery! Jenny also had no problem with being very quick to snarl and show all 50 of those sharp and gleaming teeth if provoked... I could see her slowly moving along the walk, near the hedges with that creepy-opossum gait of hers... The girls, of course,kept blabbering and drinking and had no idea when... All of a sudden, Jenny climbed on the bottom step of the stoop where the girls were sitting and emitted a hissing snarl! The girls screamed and all six of them instantly and simultaniously tried to set land-speed records while attempting to get inside the building door, and away from this suitcase-sized Rat-From-Hell! I simply howled as I watched them all trying to get though that doorway at the same time! Meanwhile, Jenny- her point apparently made, sauntered off into the dark to take care of her opossum-business, in peace. When my laughter-cramp subsided, I went back around to the bar to have a nightcap and to tell this story... I just HAD to tell somebody!:)