“In my next life I want to live my life backwards.

You start out dead and get that out of the way.

Then you wake up in an old people’s home feeling

better every day.

 You get kicked out for being too healthy,

 go collect your pension, and then when

you start work, you get a gold watch and

 a party on your first day.

You work for 40 years until you’re young

enough to enjoy your retirement.

You party, drink alcohol, and are

generally promiscuous, then you

are ready for high school.

You then go to primary school,

you become a kid, you play.

You have no responsibilities,

 you become a baby until you

are born. And then you spend

 your last 9 months floating in

luxurious spa-like conditions with

 central heating and room service

on tap, larger quarters every day

 and then Voila!

You finish off as an orgasm!”