With sophisticated accents, dark suit ready for wedding

Q. My girlfriend and I are invited to a good friend's wedding next month. The invitation says "Black Tie Optional." My girlfriend wants to get dressed up and wants me to wear a tux, but I don't own one and am not happy with the idea of renting one. I like to look good in my clothes, but I'm not quite up for the major investment involved in buying one. Is my good, well-tailored dark blue suit acceptable?

Are there any special touches that would upgrade its look?

A. You are right to forget renting. I have never understood what would prompt a man who cares about what he wears and who has arrived at a level of achievement where his friends dress in formal wear to rent his black-tie attire for some special occasion. His date is resplendent in her most elegant cocktail dress. She wears the finest jewelry she owns (or can borrow), and he comes in a third-rate rental getup.

To answer your question about whether a great-looking dark blue suit is acceptable: the wording of the invitation -- "optional" -- makes it appropriate. An invitation that states "Black Tie" means just that. You are supposed to dress in correct formal attire with all of the required bells and whistles. Here, bless them, the hosts have given you the opportunity to circumvent those rules.

That does not give a man license to be too informal. Obviously, you understand that. I am glad to help you come up with a few special elements that would move your entire look up a few notches.

With your sharp dark suit, I suggest you wear a white spread-collar dress shirt with French cuffs and your best cuff links. Either choose a stylish bow tie (it does not need to be black) or an especially handsome, perfectly knotted long tie. It could be a dark woven-silk solid (dressier than a repp), a pindot, or a small Hermes-like overall print pattern.

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Another possibility is a "wedding tie." This is a tie that used to be more popular than it is today -- a standard, long four-in-hand silk tie distinguished by its color, most often a solid silver/gray or ice-blue. Today's popular tie clasp would work well, ideally in a metal that matches the cuff links.

Or, another way to go -- this might be the time for the unique and sophisticated look of a fine wool vest, perhaps in ivory. You will definitely not see your look on every other guy in the room. Add a pocket square that coordinates (but does not exactly match) your tie or perhaps a small boutonniere (but not both!). As always for a dressy occasion, fine quality shined black lace-up shoes and black over-the-calf socks are the best choices.

Still, if you really want to make your girlfriend happy, you have yet another option. One way around the expense of buying a formal evening suit (aka tuxedo) is to visit one of the many "previously owned" shops. Often this is a good place to pick up a wonderful bargain. For any of who-knows-what reasons, dashing dressers take fine formal clothes to these stores and sell them for a pittance. You can buy them for not too much more.

Occasionally, you may find a 100 percent tropical-weight wool tuxedo for less than $100. Then, after a trip to the best tailor you can find, you have a perfectly fitting high quality suit of your own for far less than the cost of a new one.

Why do I like this alternative? The older suit may have a variety of small touches, such as better-grade buttons, a true buttonhole on the lapel, lining in the trousers' knees, that recent cost-cutting has prompted manufacturers to eliminate.

And you will have had the adventure of discovery.

Add your own purchase of a fresh new pleated formal shirt (with either a wing collar or a turned-down collar), black bow tie, and accessories, and you will have a dash of originality.

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