Most Savage Suhel Seth Moments

An entrepreneur, actor, columnist, activist, and author, Suhel Seth wears many hats, and with equal ardor. With a sense of humor that matches up to his command over the language, Suhel Seth is popularly known for his remarkably hilarious, solicited responses and suggestions. What’s best, is his slight propensity to give an earful to modest advice-seekers. Below-mentioned ares some of his most savage moments:

The one where he exposes the oldest trick in the book

Q. I am a 17-year-old boy in love with a classmate. Another boy’s also flirting with her. She knows about my feelings but isn’t saying whom she likes. Help.

Anonymous

This is the oldest girl trick in the book which is why men are always stumped. Look son, she is tossing two balls in the air and no one but her knows which one she will catch. If you are willing to take the risk, then continue this dalliance, but me thinks it is a waste of time. A tease is worse than an indecisive woman and this girl quite clearly is a tease who loves the attention of two typical losers. It is your call. And listen if you do get dumped, which I think is as certain as day and night, don't bother writing to me. This is an intelligent column and not a suicide helpline. You might as well call Sitaram Yechury for the latter. He is now adept at this post in their Bengal alliance with the Congress.

The one where he talks about the importance of Wren & Martin

Q. I am 19 years old and in a relationship with a guy. He wants me to become a doctor for his parents won’t agree with our relationship otherwise. What should I do?

Anonymous

Doctor for his parents? Does it mean he wants you to become a medical doctor or doctor his parents or what? If someone like you can’t even communicate in English, what hope in hell do you have to get into a relationship? Look, either way, you are doomed. My advice is to find a new lover and get hold of a copy of Wren & Martin. Do lt. 

The one where he points out that the bird in hand is always better.

Q. I am a 20-year-old girl and graduated from the UK. I had been dating a classmate there. Now back in India, I’ve become close to my ex-boyfriend. I cannot decide who to be with. Help.

Anonymous

 

There is no confusion darling. The bird in the hand is always better. That bloke in the UK will be worrying about Brexit and other sundry matters so what you must do is disengage from him and latch onto this ex of yours who very soon will be your current so that you can then tell the ex in England that you are pretty much done with him without a referendum. Get the drift darling?

The one where he advises to call the cops!

Q. I am 26. My husband is argumentative and recently he got so angry that he slapped me several times. We haven’t spoken since. It’s hurting my dignity to go up and talk. Help.

Anonymous

Go to the nearest cop station: drag his body to a police station and let him rot there. And then take all his money away and walk into freedom. This man won’t change so you’d be better off changing the man you’re with. It is as simple. But do make sure he is beaten up well and proper. And then drag him to court and make his life eternally miserable. If you live in Bihar, the cops will not even wait for your instructions to beat up the bloke. They are a law unto themselves under the democrat NK.

Nothing short of a hilarious, yet conventional take on personal problems, Suhel Seth’s savage responses to these unassuming advice-seekers, who dared to venture down that road are probably the funniest thing you will read today!

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