8 Tips for dealing with pessimists

Posted by Alan David
3
Mar 25, 2013
635 Views

Gripes and enduring pessimism of colleagues can pull us down properly. With a few simple tricks that can be avoided.

Everyone knows these sentences: I've been trying for years, forget it. - This store does not do that.- Well, I wish it but good luck!

Colleagues, who talk all bad, always know in advance what does not work or who want to have behind everything known before: They are everywhere. And they can people who want to get things moving, pretty rob the nerve.

Can go out of the way as you do not, and they will change even less. What does help: consider the own attitudes to this issue and a few techniques to acquire. We say what they are.

First Nagging and pragmatism differ

If something is presented with very negative Gusts, we often hear about any more. What a mistake may be, as some critics is perhaps no gripes, but productive pragmatism. What matters is not the rejection of a proposal, or the way it will be rejected, but on what grounds.

Second Person and content separate

 Important, but not always easy to implement: Efforts should be made to separate person and content. Every colleague and every colleague has for us a certain image. This is negative, we tend to everything he says, to first evaluate negatively. Whether such contribution was really stupid or not.What helps it? To write down suggestions without the hint from whom they came. A week later, we know that more often then not, why is the argument considered impartial.

 Third Three is a Crowd

New York's behavioral scientist and psychotherapist Roger Gil recommends a simple method to find out whether an opinion is based more on feelings, or whether the argument to something in that.

 When three people in the company, of which at least two have nothing or little to do with each other, similar to argue you should think about it in any case. Two may have been talking in the canteen of a thing, one has influenced the other. Three, however, said Gil are already a small swarm. And is often just as intelligent individual.

 4th The why question

 Simple and enormously effective: Especially negative is in office life often presented as if it was of any discussion raised. Because it is so often said, or is simply common sense. At such moments, gently but firmly ask the why question, brings the discussion going. And find out whether the colleagues have really engaged with the subject content.

5th Arguments do not take it personally

One should take his opponent and his arguments seriously in any case. Which does not mean to take a hostile attitude to his own proposal personally. The main reason: to be regarded as criticism attack leads going anywhere, is always destructive. For one's own thinking and for the group.

6th Respond with a time lag

 The principle of sleep a night over things is especially helpful when you are angry. How many misunderstandings and how much anger there have been because someone has written excited and a minute later, an excited email. If you personally attacked feel you should, if possible, return fire immediately. But for example on the next day.

 7th Not every avoid confrontation

 The foregoing does not mean to accept each and every discouragement gripes unchallenged. If the pulling down of a colleague for permanent phenomenon, one should openly talk to him about. While you can not change anyone, but you can differentiate themselves. And you shall do well not to damage even one's own life experience.

 8th Not reward bad behavior

 If the procedure described above did not help: There is no need to respond to everything that give colleagues all day long by himself. Not to hear certain comments systematically may be more effective than ever opposed to argue. There is probably no one who has no idea about it, if it is ignored.

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