Knock on Wood |
Life Happens
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Knock on Wood Aunt Mary and two of her old friends were having a glass of lemonade at her house, and talking about their health problems. "I think I must be getting old," said one of the women. "I sometimes find myself at the foot of the stairs, and I can't remember if I was going up to get something, or coming back down." "I know what you mean," added the second friend. "Sometimes I'll be standing I front of the refrigerator, and I can't remember if I wanted to take something out, or if I had just put something in." Aunt Mary sat up. "I guess I'm better off than either of you. I haven't had any problems like that so far, knock on wood". Saying that, she rapped on the table three times. She looked at the other two women and stood up. "Excuse me," she said, "Someone's at the door." iChannel TAG: earncashforclicks www.earncashforclicks.com |
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Comments (14)
 HP: 822  |
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| Yes Lynn, you're keeping us Aussies awake awfully late! Graham a bit later than me. I'm a few hours behind his time zone, it's only 12:45 in the morning where I am. :) _____________________ Take Forward Steps Daily |
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| Please forgive me ladies....At this time of the morning (It's just after 2 am ) I get a little punch drunk... |
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| Naughty boy, Graham
Why? What did I say? |
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| Triple A Double D, sounds to me like you either need new batteries or a new bra!!!
Oops, my bad. |
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| Thank you Thea for yours also. I had read the first one awhile back. And I really enjoyed the second one :) Lynn
iChannel TAG: earncashforclicks www.earncashforclicks.com  Group Administrator
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| Sorry, Thea, what were we talking about? |
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| Ah yes, remembered the other signs of getting old..........Nope, gone again. |
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| Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I need to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the hall table. I decide to go through the mail before washing the car. I put my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trash under the table, and notice that the trash can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table to take trash first. But then I say to myself, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway, I might as well pay the bills first. I take my cheque book off the table, and see that there is only one cheque left. My extra cheques are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find a bottle of coke that I had been drinking. I'm about to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the coke aside so that I wouldn't accidentally knock it over. I notice that the coke is getting warm, so I decide that I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. I head towards the kitchen with the coke. A vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye - they needed to be watered. As I put the coke down on the counter, I notice my reading glasses which I've been searching for all morning. I decide I had better take them back to my desk, but first I must water the flowers. I put the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water when suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone had left it on the kitchen table. I realise that tonight, when we go to watch TV, we will be looking for the remote, but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to take it back to the TV room where it belongs, but first I must water the flowers. I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on the floor. So, I put the remote back down on the table, to get some towels to wipe up the spill. Then I head down the hall trying to remember why I'm going that way and what I was planning to do. Now, it's the end of the day; the car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of coke sitting on the counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only one cheque in my cheque book, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. I try to figure out why nothing got done today. I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long and now I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail. _____________________ Take Forward Steps Daily |
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| Why am I so tired?? You do really need to read this. For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax build-up, poor blood or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason. I'm tired because I'm overworked. Here's why: The population of this country Australia is 20 million! 9 million are retired. That leaves 11 million to do the work. There are 7 million in school, which leaves 4 million to do the work. Of this there are 2 million employed by the federal government,leaving 2 million to do the work. 0.5 Million are in the armed forces preoccupied with finding Osama bin Laden Which leaves 1.5 million to do the work. Take from the total the 1 million people who work for state and local governments, and that leaves 500,000 people to do the work. At any given time there are 280,000 people in hospitals, leaving 220,000 people to do the work. Now, there are 219,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me. And there you are sitting on your butt, at your computer, reading jokes. Nice, real nice. _____________________ Take Forward Steps Daily |
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| There's a lot more where those came from ...just can't remember them at the moment. |
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