Ways to Know That a Marriage is Unsalvageable
by Donna Johnson ArticleIt
doesn’t matter how strong the foundation of a marriage is in the
beginning, it’s almost inevitable that troubles will arise within a
relationship that will shake a couple to its core. Whether it is
through financial trouble, fidelity or even illness, these issues are
difficult to endure even for the strongest of couples. Even through
counseling, some couples find that the initial passion is no longer
there, and it’s nearly impossible to remain happy together. There
are many clear signs that a relation can’t be saved, but due to the
strength of their initial bond it can be hard to know if and when
it’s truly over. The affects of a troubled marriage are felt by
everyone involved including friends, family members and children, but
that shouldn’t be the primary reason that a couple stays together.
If you have been struggling for a long period of time of whether you
can save your relationship, it’s time to sit down and evaluate
whether there truly is a chance. Certain conflicts that are repeated
issues may be signs that divorce is necessary for the happiness of
everyone involved.
Abuse
The
biggest red flag to end any kind of relationship is abuse. However,
an abusive relationship is one of the most difficult to end. Abuse
doesn’t have to be physical to be detrimental to a couple, and it
doesn’t appear with just men. It can be verbal, mental or sexual,
and women can often be at fault, as well. It’s likely that the
abuse has always been there, but experienced only by one partner. But
for others, it can happen toward the later part of marriage as a
result of increasing anger issues. Regardless of how long it has been
going on, abuse is something that shouldn’t be allowed to continue.
The victim must realize that when it gets to a boiling point, it’s
time to end the negative relationship in order to find happiness
again.
Addiction
When
one or both parties in a marriage are suffering with addiction, it
may be time to end the marriage. However, addiction issues aren’t
truly cut and dry. If your spouse is suffering with addiction, but
actively seeking help, this isn’t a sign that a marriage can’t’
be saved. However, if there is a constant battle between denial and
refusal to fix the issue, it may be time to walk away. One of the
biggest mistakes that couples make is that thinking that a partner
can be forced to change. Growth happens on its own, and if a partner
refuses to make positive changes when it’s so clearly affecting
them negatively, there is nothing a spouse can do to fix the
problem.
Fidelity
At
times someone who is married will fall in love with someone who isn’t
their spouse. Other times, due to unhappiness or control issues, a
spouse will seek continued comfort in someone else besides their
partner. Whether through physical or even purely emotional bonds,
this is a definite breach of trust. There are some couples that can
salvage a marriage after an affair, but many cannot. When this
occurs, it’s important to evaluate your emotions fully to assess
whether you feel that you can move past this emotional hurt and truly
forgive your spouse. If the answer is no, it’s important to end the
marriage before the negative emotions escalate and cause further
damage.
About
the Author: David
M. Shaw is a contributing author. Last year he went through a
difficult divorce with his wife of 11 years. When the procedures
became contentious he realized that he needed an attorney. The
experienced lawyers at http://familylawnashvilletn.com/
provided him with adequate representation for positive results.
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Created on Dec 31st 1969 18:00. Viewed 0 times.