The Fugitive and Robert Smalls

Ndemawnin light, we pull up side at wawship, wif em stars and stripe fline de light breeze, I bin sick.

Maybe demotion de sea. Rollin like a drunk man clambrin in bed with somepin on he mine. But I don't think so. I think I were fed we done drop into tuther world like uh fall out the sky on tuth.

It done only been couple hours since we leff uh dock. It done been free hour, maybe, since I rouse up Joshua outn he litter and come down Tradd Street, dragon he by the hand, and shushin he. I wuh sket. Sket to death. Sket UH death, but mo skettuh what they goin do to me and my chap ifn they ketch us. I done watch em whip and beat and bury live and hang and half-hang plenty runaway before. I knowed they crazy with war, now. They been crazy fed theyself, with the Yankee ship blockadin the hahbuh and the Yankee army downaway. And they done got harder on the colored folk. They harder on the free colored, even, make em wear they pass around they neck outn public.

I never been on a ship. I holdin Joshua tight twix my knees and brace myself back again a wooden wall. The ship rumble and jolt and sprung and shook like it goin shake itself slam apart. I done pray to Jesus. I moanin and prayin to Jesus uh deliver me laud God awe mighty please.

Robert and John and tother men knowed what they wuh doin, I reckon. It wuh they work, evvy day, runnin that ship. I could see they fed, though. John and them other plenty fed. But I ain't see no fear in Robert. He young, and short, and slander, and a fine lookin black man. And he aint uh fed of nothin.

We done all greed we goin kill ourselve foe we let em take us.

It wuh only couple hour. But oh, what a tehble couple hour it wuh. It wuh dark, and later the thin line demawnin peer out over the ocean. Foe time the steam whistle blowed. Neach time I jump like it the trumpet uh judgment, and hug Joshua tightuh, and tremblin with fear. And I moanin pray to Jesus. Each time a whistle diffunt. Robert knowed the secret code each fort we passin by. He blow foe. He blow tree. He blow two. Whatever. He blow shotten long.

And uh daylight ginna fill the sky, we come up on the Yankee ship, rollin on it anchor chain. It mast rollin like uh crosses of Calvary gainst uh dawn, foe the sun brek over dorizon. I seen the soldier in they blue uniform leanin over the rail, strainin to see us.

And Hannah gannuh sang. She sung “Mazin Grace”, and I, shakin with fear as I wuh, feel them tear ginnuh roll down my cheek, and I startuh sang, too. And then them others startuh sang, and we sung all the verse uh “Mazin Grace”, and then we sung “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot”, and then all the brethren sister startuh dance, dancin on the deck and cryin and sangin and shoutin like when the Spirit tek hole at a vival, and I bin fill with the Holy Ghost and praise the Laud and sung and dance and swung my Joshua and John round by the arm.

And them men in they blue uniform stare down to us holdin they rifle, like they uh watchin a minstrel show.

And Robert shout to the men in the blue uniform he thought Uncle Abe could use that ship. And they had the strangess look on they faces. I wonder they ever done seen colored folk a foe, comin fum wherever they come fum.

I wuh dancin and sangin and praisin the Laud, but oncet they come aboard, and point they rifle at us, I wuh took up with the fear again, and gan to feel sick again. And it wuhn't long a foe I frowed up. I frowed up right in front of em, it splatter on the deck at my feet, and them soldier in they blue uniform standing there with they rifle.

They tek us on board they ship, and they hold us on deck the longest time, round us with they uniform and they rifle, and they puzzle faces, while they tek Robert way to tuther part uh the ship. And I sho ain't feel free. I ain't feel no diffunt than I done feel befoe, scepter I wuh sket, and sick, and shakin, and that ship wuh rollin.

And them soldier look at us like we some kina strange animal, just unload off Noah ark. They ain't really look at us no diffunten any white person in Charleston ud look at you.

And I ain't feel free yet. I ain't feel free. But I wuh alive, and I ain't really spectuh be, and the world wuh altogether diffunt. It wuh altogether diffunt arrest of my life.

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