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In the United States, appearance management is also a “compulsory course”. In the first two months after I arrived in the United States, studying the clothes of my classmates became part of my adaptation to the school environment.
No matter which school it is, the top of the social circle pyramid is always a group of handsome boys and beautiful girls. The school also encourages students to independently develop the ability to manage appearance. Every once in a while, the school will require students to dress up to attend school-wide dinners: students sit at a table and have dinner elegantly while communicating.
In my high school, this type of social event was called Vespers. Vespers's dress code is very strict. Boys have to wear suits and leather shoes, while girls have to wear formal dresses. If the clothes are not neat and formal, they will be "pushed" out of the dinner by the instructor.
Every time Vespers, my American friends spend the whole afternoon choosing clothes and makeup. As a newcomer, I couldn’t understand their emphasis on beauty. I thought: “Is it good to look at and I can’t get a report card. Why do I spend so much effort?”
Every time Vespers, I pretend that the group of busy girls around me doesn't exist, and I do my homework in my dormitory by myself, and I didn't get up until one hour before the start to prepare. I don't remember what I wore on Vespers for the first time, but the experience of a Korean girl at the time was deeply imprinted in my mind.
In the first year of high school, there were many Koreans in the school and very few Chinese. When we stepped into the restaurant with excitement and nervousness, the Korean friend behind me was called aside by the teaching director, and was severely criticized for failing to meet the standard of clothing, as if I was once in China by the teaching director pointing at Liu Hai loudly same. However, this time the dean said: "Why don't you dress yourself well? This is disrespect for others."
I always remember this sentence. In fact, appearance management is part of shaping one's public image. American schools advocate appearance management not to encourage children to compare and judge people by appearance, nor is it like in China, in order to maintain a good style of study, tell children that appearance is false and unimportant. Instead, we should face up to its role in human society.
This is the reason for the "face-seeing world". For this reason, a male friend of mine who was studying in Stanford said something that resonated with me: "Since this is a face-seeing society and it is universal, then we Why is it necessary to emphasize that appearance is not important? I think everyone has the ability to reform themselves, and also needs to have the consciousness to reform themselves. 99% of people are not ugly, we need to face our appearance and dare to pursue beauty. Many times As long as it is sunny and clean, it is actually enough."
Compared with children in China, children studying in the United States have realized the importance of appearance management earlier. The classic image of a female schoolmaster in China is nothing more than wearing glasses, wearing a ponytail, and facing the sky every day, while the successful girls abroad have long hair and fluttering fashion!
Why are these academic masters both talented and beautiful? In fact, for them, the nature of appearance management itself is the same as that of brushing questions. It is an ability that can be improved through their own efforts, including maintenance, makeup, and dressing. Even one of my friends from Princeton, who is a scholar of God, would reflect on appearance management after participating in women's academic social activities. She said this was her "biggest harvest" from the event.
I sometimes wonder, if the concept of appearance management can be introduced into the education of Chinese families earlier, what will be the result?
In Western families, such concepts have long entered the children's minds through family members' words and deeds. It is not about educating children to pursue brand, but to cultivate taste. In fact, appearances are the same as exams. Once there is room for free management, everyone's different levels of contributions will form differences and competition, and competition will bring pressure.
I am very grateful that studying abroad has given me the opportunity to face up to my appearance as soon as possible. After all, the purpose of studying in the United States is to get rid of the filter of knowledge and make myself more competitive in all aspects.
Therefore, during the four years of high school, while I was a schoolmaster, I would dress carefully every morning, and people praised my clothes almost every day. For four years, I also worked with professional designers to do costume design, makeup and hair design for school stage plays, and I designed my own fashion work in my senior year. Invisibly, the awareness of appearance management has brought me interpersonal resources and added personality charm. Most importantly, it allows me to discover the other side that has been hidden for a long time-that self-confident, beautiful, and fashion-loving self.
Created on Dec 7th 2020 21:06. Viewed 268 times.
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