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Running from Cujo & Jehovah's Witnesses.
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 I have had the pleasure of running for cover a few times from Cujo & Jehovah's Witnesses. My Grandmother is a devout Witness and will not be deterred. She has been trying to get me baptized for as long as I can remember. I was brought into the Congregation at age 5 but I made my getaway when I turned 18 years old. I am now in my late 30's. This topic always makes me laugh especially when I reminisce about it. I decided to leave when I turned 18 years of age for a few reasons. Here are 7 glorious reasons why. #1. Overdressed and Supermodel's. When my Grandmother took me to the Assembly, I quickly realized that everyone was standing around dressed in Designer Armani Suits and Top of the Line Designer Clothing. 6 Inch Heels, Short Mini Skirts, Gold Ankle Bracelets, Lots of Jewelry and everyone looked like SuperModel's. All I kept saying was "THIS IS THE HOUSE OF THE LORD". Of Course no one paid me any attention. Everyone just kept trying to pick up men and carry on loose conversations. #2. Ministry and House to House. I was asked to stay for Ministry. This is where they teach you to go "HOUSE TO HOUSE". You go to every House on a picked block and ring the bell and talk about Jehovah and try to get them to come to your Congregation. I have been chased by so many dogs that I became real good at scaling fences. Believe me people trying to scale a fence in a long skirt or dress is not pretty. Sometimes I would walk with a piece of Raw Steak thinking I could throw it at the dogs just before they ripped me to shreds. #3. My Grandmother's awful singing. Whitney Houston she is not but she insists on sitting up in the front row and singing off key, though she believes she is the best one. My friends would ask me "Is that your Grandmother"?. I would deny it like Peter denied Christ and say... "No that ain't my Grandmother, I never saw that woman before in my life". #4. My Grandmother wore Huge Sunday Easter Hats. I could not see anything in front of me when she sat in front of me and my mother in that annoying Big Black Easter Hat with the Big Red Ribbon on it. #5. My Grandmother and the 144,000. She strongly believed she is one of the 144,000 that are going to heaven. I believed it simply to be an excuse so she could drink the wine and eat the bread on Passover. She always seemed to drink the entire Cup when it was passed to her. Then she would start speaking in tongues. RIDICULOUS. #6. The Overseer and his BVD Underpants. I came to Ministry for the first time to find the Overseer had stayed over for the night and washed all his BVD Men's Underwear by hand and laid them out to dry all over the front row of seats in the church. He tried to remove them before I saw what he did but it was too late. I yelled out "THIS IS THE HOUSE OF THE LORD YOU CREEP". #7. A Complete Denial. Another thing that really made me angry was the way they would talk about "Breaking the Seals", in the Book of Revelations, yet they never discussed your Chakras. What did they think breaking the seals were all about? A complete denial about the Chakras yet they would talk about "Cleaning out your house and making way for the Lord". Maybe they thought the house was going to get spotless clean all by itself. This was the last straw and I obviously didn't hang around long enough to find out. I got tired of getting my pantyhose stuck on the fence or ripped off trying to run from CUJO. I got tired of having to say "THIS IS THE HOUSE OF THE LORD" almost every time I attended. I got tired of being the only one saying it. I obviously had no business being there and this was my clue to leave. LORD A MERCI. Sometimes we have to "RUN FOR COVER" from those representing the Lord. My life is never a dull moment as you can see, whether I am running from Jehovah's Witnesses, Cujo or the Police. I would like to make it perfectly clear that this Blog is not to offend Jehovah's Witnesses. I am simply speaking freely about my experiences and why I am not a member. If you are a Jehovah's Witness and you love it, I respect that and have nothing more to say. If you have had similar experiences with Jehovah's Witnesses, we would love to hear it. http://www.JeunelleFoster.com Jeunelle's World |
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Comments (13)
 HP: 259  |
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| Now I feel like giving you 50 cents for a copy of The Watchtower, closing and bolting the door and peeking out of the curtains in case you decide to return! ROFLMAO!
get protected before it happens to you |
 HP: 66 |
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| Hi Wendy,
Nope, his hair isn't frizzier than mine - he hasn't got much at all. :-) WolfWoodWares OBA |
 HP: 75 |
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| Sherri That is like too funny My mom never wore mini skirts though Heaven forbid that a knee cap should show LOL I was the first in my class to wear a dress and the slip was attached and showing below the hem. It was horrible CAn't say it was religion made my life miserable (but I used to teach Sunday School) hahahaha "Since the fun exercise of chasing down prey on foot ,and then killing and eating it on the spot, is usually illegal in cities... Bike riding and running were substituted... " Come on down You can do that here LOL Poor Jean Asked to give a partner who' s hair is probably fizzier than yours LOL Jeunelle Boy am I ever glad you turned out for the best Teasing or no teasing LOL Wendy "Global Wide" "Business-in-a-Box" |
 HP: 471 |
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| Peaceful you would make a great Native American. Waste not want not. ha ha I know what you mean Jean. My friends ended up dodging me when I tried to preach to them. They would say to me later at school "Are you still trying to be one of those Jehovah's Wickedness". I would shrug it off but boy those kids were cruel. ha ha They were just as cruel as Cujo. ha Jeunelle's World |
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HP: 66 |
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| Great post Jeunelle - gave me a good laugh anyway! :-)
My partner did some bible study with Jehovah's Witnesses a few years back, but didn't join them. They were pushing him to give me up, because I wasn't interested. Jean WolfWoodWares OBA |
 HP: 109 |
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| It's the 'Foodie Thing" that keeps me energized... If I was lazy and didn't want to prepare my own meals, the body wouldn't benefit as much.
I used to review and eat in 75 restaurants a month... I simply HAD to stay in shape! Since the fun exercise of chasing down prey on foot ,and then killing and eating it on the spot, is usually illegal in cities... Bike riding and running were substituted... LOL! :) WIN Network Seminars- Your Chance To Win! |
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HP: 471 |
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I feel for you Sherri Ann Believe me, I know how you have suffered. ha ha I thank God every night that I was able to OVERCOME. ha Jeunelle's World |
 HP: 229 |
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| I got a chuckle out of this one. My mom was a school teacher. She dressed me like little house on the prairie at age 14, although she was one of those in the mini skirts and the line up the back of the stockings. I was not aloud to have friends that had cable TV (lol). Yeah, and the Christmas caroling to beg for loose change for a gigantic mansion of a church. Yes, my mothers religion made my life miserable, also.
Sherri-Anne Myers Get Paid Directory |
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HP: 471 |
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| Now Wendy you and I both know how obnoxious they can get when they drink. Sometimes it's really scary. ha I pray that God will have some mercy on them. OK Peaceful if you can do all that and cook, you must have a KILLER body. Keep it up. ha Jeunelle's World |
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HP: 75 |
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| Jeunelle I love your rendition of why LOL I used to have an aunt of mine that loved her wine as well. One day she started preaching to me and her soon looked at me and stated. Ignore her, can't you tell her nose is red. Way to much for me I started to howl in laughter. Her son and I left sitting there and went to get her another wine. LOL By the way you too slay me. FFN ROFLMAO Wendy "Global Wide" "Business-in-a-Box" |
